I am an adultolescent. I’m 25, fully employed, making enough money to be financially independent from my parents. Nonetheless, I live at home, in what some would call an extended childhood. I work just 7 miles from my parents’ house; so, when hired six months ago, I thought it just made sense to stay where I was. My parents are happy to have me, and, though it’s controversial, they won’t charge me rent. Living at home, I’m able to help out a little, and I work for the family business on the side. I’m also saving large amounts of each paycheck, placing it into downpayment and retirement savings.
Life is pretty good. My dad helps me with car problems, and my mom very often cooks dinner. I come home to people I love and enjoy. In fact, life is so good, that very goodness/comfort/ease makes me wonder about things. I often wonder if I should move out–still in town but in an apartment I rent all my own, not because I dislike my parents (not at all) or because I want more freedom. I just wonder if it’s the right thing to do, if moving out would please God in a way that my child-like living situation doesn’t. And I don’t know.
Recently I came across an article by a godly man I admire very much, whose writings/teachings/messages have impacted my life for eternal good: “A Church-Based Hope for Adultolescents.”
Among Pastor John’s many points, he suggests parents should do all they can to get their kids financial independence by age 22 or sooner. (In other words, maybe I should’ve moved out three years ago.)
I compare his thoughts with those of certain other movements, Christian movements that tell single women to stay at home until marriage–no matter when and if it comes. These same movements would likely disapprove of other life choices I’ve made: college, grad school, a career. Since godly, well-meaning Christians differ on this topic, and since I find no special revelation from God that directly tells me what to do, I feel a little unsure.
There seems to be no exact blueprint for my life situation, not that there would be if I married at 22 and started a family, necessarily. We aren’t cookie-cutter Christians, thank goodness. I focus on the things I *do* know: my eternal destiny, my relationship with Christ, my need to honor my parents, my need to work in some capacity. Beyond that, I take one step at a time, wondering. Where should I go from here? Continue my adultolescence, where my parents are pleased and I’m comfortable? or Put money into rent for a more independent living situation, minutes from home?
I trust God will show me.