Last night for the first time in seventeen years of married life, I was introduced as “the woman behind the man.” I thought, “I am? Really? I don’t feel like that. Not in the least!”
I’ve been an official stay-at-home-mom now for a full four months. And I’ve learned a few things.
- For one, it’s a whole lot easier to go to work when you’ve had a sleepless night than to stay home. When I’m exhausted, I’m a lot more brittle in-the-home than out-of-the-home, I’ve found.
- The house gets dirtier faster.
- The meals are better now.
- The laundry is about the same. I get more clothes dirty, but I have a little more time to launder them. So, I break even.
- My wardrobe is completely different, but I haven’t figured out what exactly that different looks like.
- When the kids are sick, it’s also a whole lot easier to be an at-home mom. I think that was probably the worst part about working — having to juggle schedules and sickness and to never be sure if you made the best decision.
But honestly? I don’t feel much different now as a woman and a mother and a scholar and a wife and a person and a believer now than I did six months ago. I’m pretty much the same.
Recently I mentioned to some ladies that I was now a stay-at-home-mom, and they responded as if I was now a fulfilled woman. Yeah, I like it. A LOT! Yeah, I’m very thankful! I was thankful before too. I’m tickled that I get this opportunity, but it doesn’t cut into the previous blessings God had given me.
I later heard the same women talk openly about how selfish and unChristian work-outside-the-home moms are. I thought, “They are talking about who I was. They think they can say that because, they assume, I’m different than I was. I’m not. At all.”
I just don’t think there are the vast differences between SAHMoms or WOHMoms either side presumes. We all love our kids — a lot. We all need a better system for folding the laundry. We all wish the house were a tad cleaner. We all need creative fulfillment. We all need a few more kisses throughout the day.
What’s all the hullabaloo about?