For years I have listened to worried parents concerned higher education might somehow cause their children to lose their faith. I often observed the best and brightest students discouraged from attending college because of fears that their encounters in a science or philosophy class might cause them to abandon their Christian faith.
Indeed, some early studies seemed to support this view, eventually making it a bygone conclusion in many Christian circles, particularly conservative ones.
A new study by faculty at the University of Texas at Austin has evidence to contradict this conclusion and to support a new trend: those who go on to higher education are more likely than their peers to remain faithful to their faith tradition.
Notably, today’s college-bound students are looking less for answers to life’s big questions than an advantage in the job market. They care less about education for education’s sake than a degree. To someone with a Humanities degree who made a career of higher education, this is somewhat disturbing. I encountered a lot of valuable ideas in college, so it is easy for me to think everyone else should too.
However, if parents, godparents, and pastors are doing their jobs and discussing the big questions of faith and life, a student could reasonably arrive for their freshman year having wrestled with questions of faith, and not feel the need to focus their education on these issues. We can look around us and reasonably ascertain that youth are facing difficult subjects (sex, drugs, etc…) at a younger age. We really shouldn’t be waiting until they are 18 to talk about these things nor wait until they attend a comparative religion or philosophy class to tackle the big questions about life.
It could also be said that for all the good they did as parents, parents in the 50s and 60s (the “Leave It To Beaver” parents) didn’t do such a great job with open discussion with their adolescent children. As a result, Baby Boomers arrived and settled in their dorm rooms looking for answers to questions they didn’t feel they could ask their parents. They were fodder for those eager to influence.
The second reason given in the study is that American colleges, even state universities, are less hostile to religion than they once were. Campus ministies exploded in response to the assault on religion, and this coupled with “tolerance” (arguably a double-edged sword) has led to increasing support for students of faith both in and out of the classroom.
The study did note that while students typically didn’t feel their beliefs waned in college, often religious practice does. Late adolescence/early adulthood mark independence from supervision (though that is often lacking much earlier) and the first marked opportunity to deviate from familial expectations without serious repercussion. Mom and Dad no longer have control. Mark Regnerus (one of the authors of the U of TX study) hinted at this in an interview with Christianity Today. Youth may have made the mental deviation from their parents faith/values much earlier, but not had the chance to act on it until they are on their own. This makes it easy for Mom and Dad to blame that wretched Philosophy professor or the Christian college administration that didn’t enforce their beliefs on young Johnny.
For some of these students, poor choices or a lifestyle that doesn’t coincide with their “beliefs” will lead them to eventually abandon their faith. This can be frustrating for parents and pastors. However, it can’t really be blamed on “college.” Others will sow a few wild oats, recognize that this is unfulfilling and doesn’t coincide with who they want to be, and move on to mature choices that reflect their faith. A third group will remain strongly convinced of their faith and live accordingly. Probably all of us pray for our children to be in this group.
As a parent, I can understand why some parents are fearful of higher education. However having worked with junior high through college-aged students in both collegial and church settings, I have yet to have someone tell me that they lost their faith due to a certain professor or a textbook or a program they underwent in school. My friends who abandoned their beliefs did so because they couldn’t truly hold them and live the lifestyles they wanted to. For some that was enough. Others wanted to justify their actions and went on a quest to find information to support their decisions. If anything is to be blamed it is parents that taught them self-fulfillment at all costs and who failed to recognize any outside authority in their own lives. If parents don’t obey authorities (the law, the Church) they set themselves up as the ultimate authority. Their children follow suit and whatever “I believe” (or “feel”) becomes the test of faith.
I believe my faith was strengthened with learning, through the study of science, philosophy, literature, and history. I don’t think it can be lost when students engage with real questions and are willing to make the life choices that set aside their base desires to attain to a life that demands the denial of self. To act like college might threaten their faith, is to hand our children an insecurity that makes them question if we really believe we have The Answer. If we are certain of our Christian faith, why should we be afraid to have our children question it?
November 6, 2007 at 6:15 am
Great post. I was working on a very similar post for my own blog.
“If we are certain of our Christian faith, why should we be afraid to have our children question it?”
James Sire in “The Universe Next Door” speaks of the characteristics of Christian Existentialism. Man is at the center of this Christianity (as opposed to Biblical Theism which is grounded in the Word and God centered). The shift is subtle and sometimes hard to identify. But I think that the fear of many that you describe is a big indicator.
Sire says that for those things that are grounded in the knowledge of the knower, they are really quite personal. “Knowledge is inextricably bound to the knower.” I think that ego centered religion fears rejection (as do those who follow with their ego at risk). They fear the risk of rejection of their ideas (their knowledge with which they personally identify) because it is tantamount to personal rejection. It’s a control thing and a rejection thing and an ego thing. And there’s also the potential that if one turns from the way that you’ve raised them to go, you’ve failed to do your job.
So often when this topic of fear of culture comes up, I think of the old TV commercial for Duracell where the very bulked Robert Conrad stands in a Tshirt and a Duracell on his shoulder, beckoning for someone to “Go ahead” and “knock it off.” I believe that we are in a better position that he is in that commercial, because we have both truth and the power of the Holy Spirit on our shoulder and in our hearts. Certainly, children raised in the fear of the Lord possess the same.
November 6, 2007 at 12:01 pm
Great post, really gets you thinking about the whole issue. I personally am so utterly grateful I went to university. I graduated this summer and have grown in my faith in those past 3 years more than I have in my entire life.
If I had stayed in my hometown with my family, going to my home church and hanging out with the same friends, my faith would still be rather stagnant. But in moving out of home to a new city and church, God has moulded and shaped me in a way I never would’ve imagined. There were also many things I learnt in my course (French & Linguistics) that really affirmed my faith even more.
I so agree — parents are doing their children a disservice if all they do is keep them in a Christian bubble and never let them challenge and explore Christianity for themselves. That way they will know for themselves that it is true — not just because “Mum and Dad told me so”.
Thanks for posting this!
November 6, 2007 at 1:56 pm
What a great post! I found that going to university (albeit a Christian one) helped me wean myself from my parents’ coattails and make my faith my own. For the first time, I had to answer things that I couldn’t just turn to my parents and have them tell me what to think – I had to decide for myself. Also, for the first time, I encountered other Christians who had differing beliefs than me, and it made me question a lot of the gray areas of Christianity. That was really valuable to me – and in the end I’ve returned to the principles I was brought up under, but they are MY principles now too.
November 6, 2007 at 2:49 pm
I didn’t leave the faith and I went to a very secular liberal college. I commuted, but I was with ungodly people a lot more than my family.
I finished reading “Passionate Housewives,” and I was surprised how Mrs. Chancey questioned her parent’s teaching after being in college a few years. This never happened to me. She went to a Christian colllege,too. Good thing they didn’t send her to a secular one. I guess, becauses she was influenced so easily, that that is why she does not support attending college. I just think she was very unprepared or something.
November 6, 2007 at 3:08 pm
I am so glad that this post was written! I went to a State University and I lived at home for my first 2 years. It was a bit of a cultural shock for this homeschool graduate! I am sure that I made decisions that would not have been my parents choice for me but I learned and grew from those experiences. I have to agree with Ashley, my faith is my own now because I have been tested!
I think that the social interaction aspect of college is often times overlooked, or maybe the positive aspects are overlooked. College is really just a small controlled environment mimicking the world. You have the opportunity to interact with people from different states, countries, and religions. Your faith and ideas are challenged by your peers. How better to prepare a young adult to be a Light unto the world? I can understand that it is scary for parents to send their children out into the wold, I know that many homeschoolers were afraid of their kids meeting the “wrong” crowd. But for me, I sought out kids who agreed with me in class and that I saw in church and at other Christian organizations. I never once felt alone or persecuted during my years at school. The friendships that I made during those years are priceless.
November 6, 2007 at 4:12 pm
…because we have both truth and the power of the Holy Spirit on our shoulder and in our hearts.Certainly, children raised in the fear of the Lord possess the same.
I attended a Christian college (King College, which I was shocked to find Jennie Chancey attended at one time…but that’s another post) for the first two years of my degree and a state university for the last two years of my degree. I can honestly say that, if anything, my years in college sharpened my faith. I realized very quickly in one of my freshman introduction classes entitled “Christianity and Culture” that I knew very little about what I actually believed, and that I had just been following on ‘my parent’s coattails’ as Ashley said.
By the time I attended the State university, I felt so blessed to have such a strong foundation in my faith…how I was able to witness in Literary Criticism, for example, because I could basically bring all the discussions of “isms” back to a question of is there an absolute? Because if there is…isn’t there Someone who created that absolute? How many wonderful conversations started over coffee after class in which I was able to not only share my faith, but build some lifelong friendships.
But I do think it is true that if you don’t have a good foundation to begin with, from your parents or what have you, college can and will shake you to the core. That is why I think it essential as parents that I ensure that my child’s education (they are all toddlers right now) includes a deep and strong foundation in Christ and His word.
November 6, 2007 at 6:03 pm
I appreciated this post.
When I have children, I’m going to encourage them to ask questions and challenge their faith (while, of course, reinforcing the foundational truths). I want them to know how to think about God without throwing it all out the window at the first sign of a challenge. I was forced to know Why I believed what I believe early on, in public school, surrounded by friends of other religions- and I think this was the most valuable take-away from public schools. I can learn Calculus anywhere- but facing real-life questions about faith requires that I be surrounded by those that think differently. I also learned how to respectfully dialogue with them, rather than be reactionary and argumentative. I saw, when I got to my Christian college, that many of my classmates had never thought about why they believe what they believe, because they had never been challenged to do so, always being surrounded by Christian schoolmates and church friends, and never someone who thought differently.
On the topic of not going to college because of the fear of a child ‘losing their faith’- I’m always annoyed at this stance. If God is who they claim He is, and what they believe is true, the beliefs should stand on their own and God should take care of their children (who are now adults!) out in the ‘real world’. If faith cannot hold up in the face of tests from the typical trials of life, it is not a faith at all. And, Cindy, I’ve read Sire’s book and agree!
November 6, 2007 at 6:41 pm
What amazes me about this issue is the fear, especially from those who have homeschooled their children as I have. When they turned 18 and graduated from high school (homeschool), we had complete confidence in the education that we had provided for them. They were maturing, in process, as we all are, but wise for their age. We had done all we could to prepare them for life and now we were prepared to launch them . They were following God’s leading, for He had ignited the passion for education in them. They pursued a liberal arts education- not one that is career based, but one that seeks to answer questions about God, and His creation. They were fortunate to have some of the best professors in their fields available to mentor them. Godly men and women who care about them spiritually as well as intellectually. I am blessed by these people who have reached out and nurtured my kids throughout their college years, away from home.
Recently I listened to Kevin Swanson rate Christian colleges as those that are truly Christian and those that are not (and apparently are despised by men and cursed by God). He was way offbase. My kids have gone and thrived.God is so big- much bigger than the box these folks wnat to keep Him inside.
You are so right about the foundation. Even great Christian colleges have their pitfalls. But if you have done your best to give them that firm foundation- what have you to fear?
November 6, 2007 at 7:50 pm
Great post!
I’ve never understood the fear some Christians have. If a kid is well-grounded in his faith, he’ll stick with it. So what if he questions it for a while? Frankly, I find any faith that hasn’t ever harbored doubts or questions to be a very immature one. We can’t grow in our faith if we are never challenged.
I think there is a certain segment of Christianity that is so fearful of the world at large that they’ve become completely ineffective. They shield their children so much from the things around them that they can’t possibly know how to cope once they’re grown up. If their kids are abandoning their faith once they’re on their own (if they ever get a chance to be on their own, that is), then perhaps they need to look at themselves to find the answers as to why.
We are to be in the world, but not of it. Unfortunately, I think some interpret that to mean that we are to block out every aspect of the world around us and seclude ourselves. But if we do that, then the lost world will really never see Jesus because the people who actually know him won’t associate with anyone other than fellow Christians.
November 6, 2007 at 8:37 pm
“What amazes me about this issue is the fear, especially from those who have homeschooled their children as I have. When they turned 18 and graduated from high school (homeschool), we had complete confidence in the education that we had provided for them.”
Mary, that is a great point! I think perhaps some who are afraid to send their teenagers to college are the same ones whose motivation for homeschooling was out of fear (what if my kids get tainted by xyz?) rather than a choice of what was the best education for their children.
Christian college and then the challenges of secular graduate schools matured my faith in amazing ways. I think in some ways it’s like the progression from a tricycle to a bike with a father’s hand on the back, to training wheels, to riding alone. Teenagers/young adults need room for their faith to grow, whether that’s through college or another avenue. And that involved the parent letting go…
November 6, 2007 at 8:45 pm
I agree with everyone else. This is a great post.
My son, 22 years old, is doing very well in college and he hasn’t gone bizerk nor has he given up the faith. Every time I see him, he is getting more and more mature and he is very grounded. I do agree that many of these fears are unfounded.
I never was encouraged to go to college in spite of my high grades. I LOVED school but I knew that as soon as I graduated high school I needed to get out of the house and start my own life. These were my parents’ wishes and that is how it was for a lot of my friends. I had to work 3 jobs just to make ends meet. During this time of uncertainty, I got into some trouble [understatement].
I truly believe if I had gone to college it would have spared me a lot of pain and heartbreak and it would have given me a purpose and it would have given me a plan. Since I naturally excelled in school and I loved to learn, college would have been a good choice for me. Because I didn’t go to college, my purpose was to work hard and then work just as hard at having a “good time”.
My husband has two degrees and he was very active in college groups that promoted Christianity. I met him when I was 23 and his friends became my friends. All of his friends were in college and they ALL were strong Christians who were very serious about their faith. None of them had unwed pregnancies or became drinkers or whatever.
I wouldn’t trade my life for the world because I know that God has caused all of it to work for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. I don’t say any of this with “regret” because God has redeemed those years. I also have a wonderful son out of the “bad years” and he is what kept me focused and out of even worse trouble. He eventually was the first one to tell me about Jesus and my lost condition. His daycare provider let me to the Lord after I came to her telling her what Adam had told me.
November 6, 2007 at 11:24 pm
This is my first post here; I just found your website and have been working my way through some of the archives…very fascinating.
We began homeschooling back in the early 80′s when homeschooling was just getting a popular start. I read every homeschooling book and subscribed to every magazine I could find. Back then, Mary Pride was the most widely read because she knew everything about everything. As I look back now, I really respect her knowledge on the best curriculum, but question some of her other ideas. Anyway, we have had fellowship with many homeschooling families along our journey. Most of them have wonderful families and children, but come from a wide range of philosophies as far as education is concerned. However, through the years I hate to admit that I have observed a sad decline in the actual “education” part of homeschooling.
My husband and I each only have our Associates Degrees, but instilled in all of our children the idea that they should go on to college. We chose to take the community college/ then transfer to a university from there route. It has worked well for us, and our children have so far all kept their faith and grew stronger in their journeys. Sometime before our oldest three transferred, we sent them to David Noebel’s Summit Ministry Camp in Colorado Springs. It helped to re-affirm what we already taught our children before being combatted with some of the secularism of the university.
We have five children. Our oldest son began community college at 16, then transferred to a state college at 18. He graduated from there at 19 (two weeks before his 20th birthday) and is now in his fourth year of medical school. He will get his MD at the ripe old age of 23. There is no way he could pursue his calling and become a surgeon if he didn’t go to college.
Our second daughter said she would never get married until she graduated college. Well guess what? She got married last July. Her husband is working while she finishes her last two years of school. She is determined to finish. If she chose not to finish, that would be okay too.
Our third child will be transferring to a secular university in January. She would like to become a registered dietitian. That is something she can’t do unless she goes to college. Our fourth child is just starting community college, and our fifth will gradually start taking classes along with his high school work next year.
Our children all have different gifts and abilities. Each one begins college when we feel they are strong enough in their faith and their school abilities. God has a plan for everyone, whether it is college or not. Exposure to the community college while they are still living at home has been a great option for us to help us prepare them for when they move away. It isn’t for everyone, but I am thankful it is an option for us.
I agree with the posts here. Solid faith becomes stronger when it is tried and tested. College is a good age to test your faith. Now if you asked me about sending kids off to the public school when they are 6, you will get a totally different answer!
November 7, 2007 at 12:04 am
This is a fascinating topic and touches on something that I have really struggled with: Why do Christian parents influence their children (or force them, at times) to make decisions based on the fear of the consequences? College is an excellent example of this. I come from a conservative homeschool background which I have mentioned in my comments on other posts. My parents discouraged me from going to college when I graduated because they honestly and earnestly wanted me to get married and believed that it was their responsibility to take care of me until God should so bring me a husband.
After 5 years of absolutely no interest from men my father finally told me that he thought I should go to college–that I was intellectual and gifted in that way and it would be a waste of my gifts to continue staying at home. By this time my family lived in a VERY rural area so he knew this would necessitate me leaving home and possibly living hours away.
On his encouragement I participated in a summer linguistics program over 1,000 miles away, decided that I liked college and moved 2 states over to go to school full-time. My faith has never wavered as a college student, but, unfortunately, no nice intellectual man came along for me either:-) Now I am living in Chicago, teaching in an urban high school and pursuing my calling to minister in the city. I am still single, turning 29 tomorrow, and learning to embrace this time in my life with joy. If my parents (or I myself) had been governed by fear none of this could have taken place.
We belong to the God of the Universe, after all, who sacrificed his beloved Son to bring us into intimacy with Himself. If he stopped at nothing to bring us in, do you really think he is going to be stumped by the paltry powers of egotistical men and women who refuse to accept his existence? I don’t know, it just seems ridiculous to me. But I am not a parent, so I realize I must extend grace and accept that I don’t understand all the implications of these types of decisions.
Am I missing something, though? Is it really that terrifying, even in the light of who our God is? I would appreciate some feedback from parents.
November 7, 2007 at 2:45 am
“We belong to the God of the Universe, after all, who sacrificed his beloved Son to bring us into intimacy with Himself. If he stopped at nothing to bring us in, do you really think he is going to be stumped by the paltry powers of egotistical men and women who refuse to accept his existence? I don’t know, it just seems ridiculous to me. But I am not a parent, so I realize I must extend grace and accept that I don’t understand all the implications of these types of decisions.”
Beautifully said!
November 10, 2007 at 5:48 pm
You all said this so well!
I agree, and there are other ways that are good for having children test their faith at a younger age.
I participated in several church sponsored service projects as a high school teen.
Those events and experiences taught me very quickly to question my ‘parents’ faith and make it my own. Especially after my first such trip when one of the persons I was serving (nailing on a new roof) was an atheist who continually called me out on my responses to her questions…
“Girl… that’s your Papa speaking… are you going to let Momma and Papa tell you what for? Girl… use your brain!”
Naturally, she was thinking I’d throw away the values I was taught… but instead I’ve questioned them, studied them and made them my own!
Going to Redeemer College University in Ontario was an extension of that time in my life.
I was blessed with parents that respected my intellect and encouraged me to live life fully by learning to find a way to live life more fully by appreciating both the intellectual, spiritual, emotional, and physical sides of life.
To forbid University to some women gifted with clear intellectual gifts is going to leave them very frustrated… and potentially turning their frustrations on the wrong thing… their faith!
November 11, 2007 at 3:17 am
I completely agree with your post – with one caveat. I would be very choosy about the type of ‘Christian’ college my child went to, moreso than a secular college, because seeing Christianity poorly executed by those who claim to follow it is far more damaging to one’s faith (particularly seeing those flaws instutitionalized) than being in a secular environment for many people. It is all too easy to succumb to cynicism in that type of environment and it is harder to develop a strong, independent faith (at least that is what I have seen based on my experiene – it is similar to the issue with Christian schools. For some students they are a wonderful support to one’s faith, for others they are a mechanism that pushes the student further from God and creates additional barriers to overcome).
But aside from that caveat, I agree with you. Our faith cannot stand up to rigorous thinking and exposure to other ideas. We do not have to live based on fear – that is one way to ensure that our kids will be less likely to embrace the faith as adults (according to Tim Kimmel’s book “Why Christian Kids Rebel”).
November 15, 2007 at 3:08 am
“Others will sow a few wild oats, recognize that this is unfulfilling and doesn’t coincide with who they want to be, and move on to mature choices that reflect their faith.”
I hesitate to comment because I agree with the post and comments to a large extent. However, I think the post and some of the comments, perhaps unintentionally, dealt a bit flippantly with the sewing a few wild oats category I quoted above.
I was homeschooled for middle school, but other than that went to public schools, including a very large high school, so I was not very sheltered, both my parents are godly and were involved parents, I was a Christian and active in ministries etc, and I was thought of as a mature and responsible teenager.
When I went to college, away from my family, I did not question my faith, but did test out sinful and destructive choices. As someone who dealt with the pain and heartache and consequences of sowing “a few wild oats” and finding it “unfullfilling” please let me tell you that it is something I would never wish on my child. I think the number of “prodigal phase” testimonies floating around Christian circles do young people a big disservice, because they imply that you can party for a while then come back on track with no harm done. God was faithful to me even when I was being disobedient to Him, but those were hard, hard lessons.
I did not fall into sin and wrong choices because I was an idiot (I was at an Ivy League school, it happens there too), I was a people pleaser who got around the wrong people and tried to please them. So I do think a lot about college for my children and have discussed this at length with my husband, because I do not want them to have to learn the same lessons I did. I realize that a lot of this hinges on the way we teach our children when they are young, but please do not toss the issue away as “so what if he questions his faith for a while?”
My husband and I both value higher education and expect our children will go to college (certainly daughters as well as sons), but we will be careful, not out of fear that our faith can’t stand the test, but out of healthy regard for what can happen.
November 18, 2007 at 1:56 am
When I finished high school, I was pretty dismissive of college. (Yes, at 17 influenced by the values of non-trad learning and the inanity of college trend.) Thankfully, my Dad was more of a realist, and did encourage me to take classes, but also supported me in the internships and apprenticeships I pursued. In retrospect, I see that it would have been better to have finished my BA then–even though my real desire was to marry Hubby and have a houseful of children!
And now. . . here I am, with a houseful of children who are getting older, Hubby in grad school, and I’m back in college. And it is SUCH a blessing to me. I’m really thankful for this, and know that this has been the Lord’s timing.
While I do not disparage non-traditional forms of learning, I will certainly have the assumption that my boys will go to college unless the Lord very clearly reveals that their calling requires a very different sort of education.
That is a lot of background for the point I want to make. . . I am in agreement with the majority on this thread that college is something to be valued and that a strong walk with the Lord, a good support network, and firm grounding in a local church are very good for not being swayed by the philosophies of this age.
Still. . . not out of fear should be avoid college, but I do believe it is important to be realistic about just how difficult it can be to put up with the constant bombardment of professors and classmates with presuppositions that are in such contrast to Christ and the Bible. It can be very wearying. (And I say that as a well-established Christian, older student, with little concern about my appearance to peers.) An anthropology class last semester was just one long diatribe of relativism and against almost all I hold dear. The teacher and students were so out of touch with much of reality. At times I felt like I had to disprove their stereotypes. Other times I felt like I had to earn a right to be heard, “Hey, I listen to WMNF and buy organic and am not marching in lockstep with the Republican party!”
All this to say, of course, we should not make fear-based decisions and worry that college is too dangerous for our children–but we do need to be realistic about the constant, wearying bombardment they will likely face from those who eyes are darkened to the Truth of our Lord.
November 18, 2007 at 9:47 pm
It IS hard to be a Christian at a secular college. That doesn’t mean it’s easier anywhere else. I wonder how a faith that can’t deal with State U’s temptations would fare, say, on the mission field or in the business world (where faith certainly doesn’t come in for the open criticism that it does in a place dedicated to arguing about ideas, but where the values associated with Christianity are ROUTINELY violated–maybe it’s easier to ignore that way). In addition, I agree that bad choices can be made very easily at college and they stay with you, but in my own experience, I also realize that the decision to make those bad choices was mine and the fundamental problem was with my character, not where I was. I would have been the same awful person had I been living an outwardly virtuous life at my parents house, I just wouldn’t have realized it as fast–or worse, maybe ever.
Having taught at the college level (at a very elite institution), I think that professors do shape how students talk about religion. As a teacher, I could not use my classes to proselytize, but I did shape my syllabi to ask questions that led many students to share religious ideas and discuss these ideas in a respectful way. It IS hard to be the only Christian in a classroom, particularly if there is an oppositional attitude in the room, but if one student has the bravery to speak out, others often reveal themselves, I’ve noticed. College is a great way to learn courage and to learn how to talk to people about faith in an honest but compassionate way.
On another website a long time ago, I read a similar discussion in which the participants had just about concluded that college was a no-no. One person said something to the effect of, “if a person doesn’t believe in God, why would I need to listen or spend time with that person? They have nothing to offer me.” I didn’t feel like entering the fray, but I wondered why she didn’t think that she might have something to offer them. Christians have to go into all the earth and create disciples, and that means the university, too, even though the thought of the place is scary.
November 20, 2007 at 12:51 am
I’m the one who initially said, “So what if he questions his faith for a while?” I did not mean that flippantly, nor did I mean that it’s okay for a student to run around “sowing his wild oats.” My point was merely that at some point, everyone has to question their faith and test it to see if it is real and his or her own. I can have the faith of my parents (and I do), but until I truly realize that it is truth and has meaning to me, it means little in my life.
My husband and I teach the middle school Sunday school class at our church, and we always know which kids have truly become Christians versus the ones who are merely parroting their parents’ teachings. Their parents are doing the right thing by bringing them up in the Christian faith, but no one really has much of a relationship with Christ until he or she makes it his own, and not that of his parents. I hope that makes sense what I’m trying to say.
When I said “so what,” I was referring to the fact that so many parents seem terrified to have their kids go out and start thinking for themselves. If they’ve been brought up well and have been taught their faith well, the hope is that they will stick with it. But as we’ve all been given brains and personal will, sometimes people will make decisions contrary to their parents’ teaching. To disallow a kid to make his or her own decisions is to stunt him or her, in my opinion. Let a kid question the faith of her parents because if she never does, how much of it is really personal faith, as opposed to simply reciting what she’s been taught all her young life?
November 20, 2007 at 3:31 pm
I can’t tell you how refreshing it is to see someone advocating college for today’s young people, rather than diminishing education and claiming the world too harsh and cruel for them. It is important to have our children’s faith tested. You can only do so much as a parent… you can hover over them and protect them, but if you don’t truly have their hearts, and if the Lord doesn’t either, than yes, college is an enormous snare for them. But then again God is sovereign and has taken many a person into his hands as the whiles of the world were about to drown him/her, and their lives were drastically changed for the better. On the other hand, there’s always the troubled child whose heart was never won by God or parents, and he/she succumbs to the world. But then (as you have said) there is the firm follower of Christ (who really is not such a vast minority) whose faith is certainly tested at college, but who comes out of the “fire” more passionate and in love with their God, and more alive with the realization of their identity in Him, and they often leave a wake of “new believers” behind them. College is not for EVERYONE, but should be viewed with discretion. I am looking forward to my venture into the “college world” but know that I must be constantly on my guard.
Thank you for touching upon this subject with such grace and clarity!
Cheers!
– Jo
http://followtheroadlesstraveled.blogspot.com
November 22, 2007 at 5:36 pm
I heartily agree with Catherine (#17) I have no preoblem with university education. I was not home schooled, but even so uni life came as an eye opener- not always in the best way .I know my husband could not stand the sin he saw around him in his halls of residence.
I was saved before attending uni- but I fell. My faith was not influenced (although obviouslyt it had grown cold due to backsliding)and my gracious God brought me back and renewed my faith. Once you are saved you are saved and praise God, He does not turn His back on us. BUT- there are consequences to backslidign and our actions. We cannot stop our young people from making mistakes and falling into sin. We can only love them pray for their tue salvation and teach them the way in which they should go….and then love them and support them if they have to go through the painful process of falling and repenting. I make no excuse for my own failing- there is none, but I am glad I was led to see my own weakness within the relatively contained world of uni before hitting adult hood and the working world.